Four (or Five!) Reasons Why

…James Bond Will Never Die

1. Every villain, despite their evil genius, is a moron. They always set up some elaborate way of trying to whack Bond, giving him time to escape, be rescued, or find some other way of miraculously surviving.

2. Most men want to be Bond; most women want to be with Bond.

3. Bond appeals to everyone. It just depends on which version of Bond you like - Sean Connery (1962–1967; 1971), George Lazenby (1969), Roger Moore (1973 -1985), Timothy Dalton (1987 - 1989), Pierce Brosnan (1995 - 2002) or Daniel Craig (2006 - present).

4. Great dialogue. Bond: “Do you expect me to talk?” Goldfinger: “No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die!”

5. 22 Bond movies have grossed over $4 billion worldwide. That’s one hell of a franchise, cash cow and star-maker!

Click here for a Bond villains and here for the Bond girls. Also check out some memorable Bond quotes. You can also vote for Bond on Ethel’s blog.

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….The First Post-Game Beer Tastes So Good

1. You’re dehydrated so it’s your body’s way of saying you’re doing it a favor by replenishing the liquids you’ve lost.

2. Any time someone brings you a cold beverage is a good thing…even if you have to pay for it.

3. Red wine may be the elixir of life but beer usually tastes better…unless we’re talking about a great steak and a robust Merlot.

4. Beer is only one syllable so if you’ve really exerted yourself, it’s easy to blurt out.

5. For some reason, it makes me think of Homer Simpson quotes, which makes me laugh - usually out loud.

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…Superman is the Greatest Superhero of All Time

1. Flying with no assistance - no jet packs or shooting webs - is by far the coolest superpower. Who, as a kid, didn’t dream of flying.

2. All the best superheroes have capes. Aquaman - no cape, no cool.

3. With the exception of some obscure rock from a far away planet, the guy is basically invincible. Find me a person who can match his powers - super strength, super speed, super breath, mental powers, super ventriloquism and super hypnotism. Crazy stuff!

4. As Clark Kent, he has the easiest disguise of all superheroes. Glasses. Just glasses. I doubt the people of Metropolis are that obtuse. Just a simple, brilliant disguise.

5. Lois Lane.

Not everyone agrees with me. Click here to see why Superman is “a dick.” And here to see “My Biggest Complaint” with the Man of Steel. Also, check out this Digg post about how Clark can’t seem to keep his real identity to himself.

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…Michael Vick Is A Dumbass

1. Dog fighting is savage, sadistic and cruel. And stupid.

2. Dog fighting is illegal. You’re multi-million dollar star in one of North America’s highest profile sports. Why jeopardize your reputation and a lifetime of financial security?

3. If you’re going to do something as dumb as promoting and participating in dog fights, don’t do it on your own property. And certainly don’t think that anyone is going to believe you when you said you didn’t know it was going on.

4. Don’t count on your “friends” to keep their mouths shut. It took about 12 seconds before everyone rolled, and Vick was left holding the bag.

5. You’ve already been hit with one law suit, claiming negligence and battery. You should know better than to break the law again. Then again, star athletes seem to be able to get away with anything these days. Can you say, “Kobe” or “O.J.”?

For more, check out the US Humane Society. Also check out here for sentencing in the Vick case. And here for an interesting perspective on pets as property and what that means.

Update: Blogging Stocks believes Vick’s plea is good business for the NFL. Meanwhile, Twincities.com is reporting the St. Paul Saints, a minor league baseball team, will hand out a chew toy to the first 1,500 fans at its home game tonight. A portion of the proceeds from the game will be donated to the newly merged Humane Society,

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….It’s Tough to be an Urban Bicyclist

1. SUVs and trucks believe they have the right to dominate the entire road even if it means moving into bicycle lanes so they can get from point A to point B faster.

2. Potholes, sewer grates, streetcar tracks and road debris make riding an urban obstacle course.

3. Bicycle thieves are non-discimminate and increasingly brazen. They’ll steal anything and everything, which means the $25 beater you think has absolutely no interest to thieves will likely be stolen at some point. And forget about relying on your expensive Kryptonite lock to ward off these bike bandits.

4. Drivers don’t pay enough attention to bicyclists. Of course, it’s tough to pay attention when your cell phone is ringing, you’ve got a Blackberry message to answer, your make-up needs touching up, or your children need a snack.

5. Cities aren’t serious about bike lanes. Sure, they build them to wrap themselves in the green/alternative commuting movement but a two-foot wide lane on the edge of a bustling urban street doesn’t provide much comfort.

For more on the perils of commuting by bicycle, check out the National Post , which has a story about 16-year-old who is considering give up riding her bike to work. For some great tips on how to make commuting by bicycle easier, this post by Commute By Bike is first-rate.

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